Trampling Pride
Thirteenth Tuesday of Ordinary Time: Matthew 20:20-28
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You can read today’s readings on the USCCB website.
Today is the feast of St. James, the Apostle. When I read this Gospel story about James and John, I’m challenged about who I think not only qualifies to be a disciple of Jesus, but also who can be a saint. I mean, clearly they (and their delightful mother) felt that they deserve a special place to honour the work they do with Jesus. I look at this story and just think, ‘Wow! That’s so prideful! How could they even believe they deserve that more than the others?’
But I have to pause here for two reasons. The first is that despite their (and their mother’s) request, Jesus only promises them a hard life; he does not promise what they asked for: a place at his right and left hand in his Kingdom.
Second, though they presented themselves with this self-serving request, Jesus still entrusts his mission to them. And they rose to that challenge. It is in their rising to that challenge for love of Jesus, both during his life and after his ascension, that their life warranted sainthood. After all, not every Apostle became a saint. There was something internal that needed to change in James and John for them to have turned into beloved and faithful evangelists.
I am reminded of the many times I, too, am prideful like James. I am not immune to making that same mistake, believing that I should be treated better than others because of all that I have done or given up. Jesus speaks those same words to me, too: am I able to drink of his chalice? Am I able to accept that my work does not guarantee me a particular reward in the Kingdom?
The thing is, the reward isn’t so much a future place of honour before others, but about being able to recognise the gift of Jesus’ presence with us in every moment. The Kingdom began with his incarnation; we can experience the reward of eternal life right now! Do I recognise this in the good times and the bad?
Ultimately, will I drink the chalice of suffering in my life? Yes, undoubtedly. Will I drink it willingly, knowing that my reward is knowing Jesus is accompanying me every step of wretched experiences? … I hope so. This is truly a work in progress. Will I drink it with love instead of vindictiveness, or anger at others (even if they caused it), or a sense of self-righteousness?
James managed it, by the end. The guy who asked to be highly rewarded in sight of everyone? the one who wanted to call down a torrent of fire on a Samaritan town because they had disrespected his rabbi and chose not to believe in him? This James was transformed into a man who led the believers in Jerusalem through the initial persecution and was killed for it by Herod (Acts 12:2). He knew the reward would not be honour before others, something else was inspiring him.
James underwent a trampling: his love for Jesus and his church stomped down his sense of pride, growing in its place a willingness to sacrifice everything for this love. In that familiar turning-expectations-upside-down fashion that we see throughout the Scriptures, James’ martyrdom is a fulfillment of his request for honour: it has been transformed into the honour of serving God and God’s people with his whole life. By the grace of God, he has trampled his pride.
May we, too, find our perspectives turned around so that our lives can be transformed into God’s glory, like James’ life was.
St. James, pray for us.
Very insightful. I had to stop and think about it. I'm proud of what I've accomplished, but if it weren't for Christ watching over me, I could have turned out a narcissist. God provided me enough real friends to keep my head on straight.
Human beings,in our flesh nature(which we operate out of most of the time)are beings subject to inner bitternesses,feelings of jealousy,envy,or operate out of a judgemental spirit. I say be the best you can be and don't worry about anything else!